What’s in it for me? Learn how to hack the system, become a leader, and create change.
The traditional narrative of success – work hard and the world will open doors for you – doesn’t apply to everyone. For those starting from the “outside” – that is, women, people of color, members of the LGBTQ+ community, and anyone else not historically represented in the halls of power – the playing field isn’t level.
As the first Black woman to be nominated by a major party for governor, Stacey Abrams knows what it’s like to be an outsider. But throughout her successful career in politics, entrepreneurship, and the nonprofit world, she’s discovered that differences provide a vital strength.
These blinks offer her hard-won advice on how to find hidden pathways to leadership, how to prevail despite systemic inequality, and how to overcome inner doubt and outside prejudice.
In these blinks, you’ll learn
how a spreadsheet gave Abrams lifelong courage;
why you should aim to have a “Work-Life Jenga” not a work-life balance; and
how power mapping can help you reach your goals.
If you’re starting from the outside, the first step on the path to leadership is embracing ambition.
When the Rhodes Scholarship committee in Jackson, Mississippi asked applicant Stacey Abrams how the award would change her life, she froze for a second. Abrams, who’d just graduated from Spelman College, hadn’t actually thought it through. In fact, she almost didn’t apply, despite her professors’ urging. She knew that if she applied for the prestigious award, she didn’t want to lose – and she was sure she wouldn’t win. A Black woman hadn’t ever secured the Mississippi nomination before.
It was the dean of her college who ultimately convinced her to apply, saying she was almost guaranteed to win if she got past Mississippi. And get past Mississippi she did; she was selected to advance to the finals a few weeks later.
Ultimately, she didn’t win the scholarship. But it was a defining moment for Abrams because she summoned the courage to try. She realized that she could widen the scope of her aspirations – leading her to eventually attend Yale Law School, the most exclusive law school in the country, which would set the course of her career.
The key message here is: If you’re starting from the outside, the first step on the path to leadership is embracing ambition.
As Abrams discovered, ambition means permitting yourself to stretch beyond what feels safe. Her advice for women, minorities, and anyone who’s been historically denied power is to locate your ambition. Ask yourself: What do I want?
Abrams first did this during her freshman year of college, reeling from a painful breakup and sitting in the computer lab. In a haze of indignation and introspection, she decided to redirect her energy toward her professional life. Abrams urgently typed her goals for the next 40 years into a spreadsheet. This spreadsheet helped her to visualize success and experience what it was like to want things for herself. And it’s something that Abrams still uses today.
Once you’ve figured out your ambition, consider why you want it and how you’ll get there. Organize your plans around why, not what, and be willing to change course. One of the items on Abrams’s spreadsheet was to be the mayor of Atlanta by the age of 35. But she ultimately realized that she was too focused on the job title and that her vision – to serve communities ravaged by racism and poverty – stretched well beyond Atlanta.
We tend to map our goals based on the likelihood of success rather than our passion. But passion is what helps us go from goal setting to taking action. To identify your ambition, write down five things – and it can be anything – that you would choose to do for the rest of your life.
Minority fear is complex and insidious – but you can confront it and use it to your advantage.
For minorities, one of the greatest obstacles to realizing ambition is the conviction that you’re too “other” to be a leader. When Abrams ran for governor, even many of her closest friends and supporters insisted that Georgia wasn’t ready for a Black woman.
It wasn’t for a lack of qualifications. On the contrary: at 29, she was hired as deputy city attorney for the City of Atlanta, and five years later, she was elected to the Georgia House of Representatives. Just four years after that, she rose to Democratic minority leader. But no Black woman had ever become a major-party gubernatorial nominee before – so it didn’t seem realistic.
The key message here is: Minority fear is complex and insidious – but you can confront it and use it to your advantage.
If all outsiders were too afraid to challenge norms, nothing would change. So, begin to overcome your fears by naming them. Perhaps ambition feels like a double-edged sword: if you fail, you’ll make it harder for anyone who looks like you to rise, and if you succeed, you’ll be alienated from your minority group. Maybe, deep down, internalizing stereotypes has led you to question your own capabilities.
These fears are deep, real, and not easy to dismiss. What you can control is how you approach them. Take Abrams’s experience when she became minority leader. It was her job to speak truth to power, but she couldn’t be too assertive in her critiques of Republicans’ actions. If she was, she’d run the risk of feeding into stereotypes – that as a woman she was shrill, or as a Black person she was too aggressive. At the same time, she worried that if she embraced her naturally introverted, thoughtful disposition, she’d be perceived as weak.
After careful consideration, Abrams decided to lean on what worked for her in the past: her strengths as a wordsmith. At first, her Democratic colleagues were frustrated that she wasn’t delivering dramatic takedowns of Republican policies. But she won them over by giving speeches that were powerful in their incisiveness, not their volume. Like Abrams, consider how you can be your authentic self while still reading the room. You can’t beat every stereotype. But you can show that there’s value in your difference.
Write down your best and worst traits and give examples of them in action. Why do you like or dislike those traits? Now, write down what you think others would say are your best and worst traits and why.
Outsiders can navigate their way to power by hacking traditional systems.
In 2014, the Democratic Party had very little power in Georgia. Voters hadn’t elected a Democratic governor in 15 years. They hadn’t voted for a Democratic presidential nominee in 22. As the minority leader of a small assembly of House Democrats, Abrams couldn’t do much to drive change.
Until she got creative. That year, Abrams and Lauren Groh-Wargo founded the New Georgia Project, a nonprofit dedicated to registering 800,000 eligible, unregistered voters of color in the state. Getting them on the rolls would change the political landscape of Georgia – which is projected to be the first majority-minority state in the Deep South by about 2026. In the months leading up to election season in 2014, Abrams fundraised $3.5 million and they submitted 86,000 new voter applications.
Yet, on Election Day, the movement was stymied by the Republican secretary of state, who illegally canceled 40,000 of those applications. But the organizing continued, and as of 2018, another 200,000 new voters had been registered.
The key message here is: Outsiders can navigate their way to power by hacking traditional systems.
Abrams knows firsthand that a meritocracy doesn’t apply to those who face systemic inequality. Take the average return on investment on a four-year degree in the United States. For a white family with a median income, that amount is $55,869. For a Black family, it’s $4,846. And finding a job is also a challenge for outsiders. Many industries are blocked by gatekeepers who keep their inner circles small by only hiring people through referrals, despite public job postings.
To gain access, look for hidden pathways to entry. Try searching for non-obvious connections, like an alumnus of your school who’s a current employee of the company you’d like to work for. Ask these connections for advice. Or seek out groups like Lesbians Who Tech, who hold events around the country and share how they hacked their way into the industry.
Get your foot in the door by interning or volunteering. In these roles, go beyond what’s asked of you and figure out what else needs to be done. Then make your case for why you should have a permanent role.
Finally, recognize the difference between humility and self-doubt. Early in Abrams’s career as a legislator, she’d deflect praise with some variation of “anyone could do it.” That is, until a colleague pulled her aside and warned her, “If you keep saying you’re nothing special, they’ll start to believe you.”
Figure out what kind of support you need and build a “board of advisors.
When Abrams became Atlanta’s deputy city attorney, she wasn’t warmly welcomed by her team. They were a tight-knit crew – and one of them had expected to be promoted to the role before Abrams arrived. Abrams was the youngest member of the law department, she’d come from a corporate tax law firm, and she hadn’t had a leadership role since college.
After weeks of trying and failing to gain their support, an unlikely mentor helped her: the law department’s financial manager, Laurette Woods. Trained in human resources, Woods helped Abrams identify what she was doing wrong: she came off as arrogant in her eagerness to prove she belonged there, and she didn’t make an effort to get to know her colleagues personally. For the next few months, Woods taught Abrams how to establish leadership, manage her employees, and work on her personal touch.
Woods may not have been a typical mentor – in the hierarchy of the law department, Abrams ranked higher than her, and she didn’t give Abrams expertise on legal issues. Yet, Abrams credits her with saving her budding career.
The key message here is: Figure out what kind of support you need and build a “board of advisors.”
Outsiders and minorities face complex challenges that often require guidance from a variety of sources. But before you look for mentors, do some introspective digging to make sure you’re worth the time and investment. Examine your personality, your strengths, your weaknesses. Self-awareness will help you forge authentic connections and process outside advice.
Next, build a mentorship network by being intentional about what you’re looking for. Perhaps you simply need a sponsor – someone who knows you well enough to sing your praises to another insider. Or maybe you need an adviser, someone who you have a deeper relationship with, who advocates for you. Your adviser's background should be different from yours so that she can help you read situations from various angles.
A situational mentor is good for when you need a short-term sounding board. And a peer mentor is an ally who understands your particular challenges and someone whom you can support in turn.
It’s important to help your mentors help you. As a mentee, it’s your responsibility to set up the mentorship you want. Don’t wait for your mentors to reach out to you – set up a schedule for check-ins. Be sure to ask valuable questions that only they can answer. And don’t wait for them to offer help; ask for what you need. Only you know what your situation requires.
Money is one of the biggest obstacles to leadership. Overcome it by gaining financial fluency.
After graduating from Yale Law, Abrams was offered nearly six figures to work at a big corporate law firm. But while her colleagues were buying houses and luxury cars, Abrams was still renting. Sure, her starting salary was impressive – but her credit score wasn’t.
Before beginning her new job, she realized she’d have to submit a personal fitness application as part of the Georgia bar exam – a detailed record of all past missteps, including credit defaults. Throughout her academic career, scholarships had covered her tuition, housing, and fees. But for everything else, Abrams borrowed. Loan money went toward other living costs and helping her family. After all of those expenses, there often wasn’t enough left over to pay her credit card bills.
As she prepared to sit for the bar, Abrams knew the time had come for her to confront her financial failures. This meant dedicating the last of her student loans and most of her law firm signing bonus to settling her credit card debt. It also meant deepening her understanding of personal finance.
The key message here is: Money is one of the biggest obstacles to leadership. Overcome it by gaining financial fluency.
Getting a handle on your finances is difficult when systemic biases undermine your attempts. So what can you do? First, honestly assess your past financial missteps while acknowledging the barriers in your way. Self-awareness is crucial to getting ahead of the problem.
Next, if you’re in debt, make a plan to climb out. This may require sacrifices in the short term. Consider a side hustle to make extra cash, and if others need your financial support, be honest with yourself about how much you can afford to share. Get support from a personal financial advisor or pick up a copy of Personal Finance for Dummies.
Then you can begin to build financial fluency. Learning from insiders how financial decisions are made will boost your credibility as a leader. You can build financial competence by volunteering at a local organization, like the PTA, or taking a course on financial management at your local college.
If you’re fundraising for a campaign or a start-up, don’t be afraid to ask for investment. Women and people of color often question whether they’re entitled to getting support, but in reality, most people who make investments don’t expect a guaranteed return. Instead, they expect effort and a high probability of success. Finally, be sure to know the details of your plan inside out – like how much money you need and exactly what it’ll fund.
Prepare for both success and failure, and learn how to be wrong.
In her first year as a tax attorney at a private practice, Abrams volunteered to take on an important line of research. The case involved one of the biggest nonprofits in the country, which was facing a tax audit from the IRS. After many hours of poring over laws and codes, Abrams seemed to have found the solution to its problem.
The senior partner scheduled a conference call with the client to share Abrams’s memo. But at the last minute, Abrams noticed a line that she’d skipped – which reinforced the IRS’s opinion and would put the nonprofit in financial jeopardy.
The key message here is: Prepare for both success and failure, and learn how to be wrong.
Abrams worried that admitting her grave error to the partner could end her career. She tried to rationalize not owning up to her mistake. Perhaps they wouldn’t even end up using her research, or maybe the IRS would be convinced by the explanation. Ultimately, 30 minutes before the call, she explained to the partner that she’d misread the code. He looked disappointed but said he was glad she’d told him and sent her back to her office with a new case file.
Minorities are held to higher standards in how they handle tricky situations. They often feel extra pressure to be right all the time. But if something goes wrong, it’s still better to take responsibility and be honest about mistakes; if you’re not, it could cost you in the long run. The best leaders stumble and fall and still choose to do the right thing.
Effective leaders also know how to admit they’re wrong. And when they’re unsure, they couple an “I don’t know” with a way to find out. Use the information you gain from making mistakes to learn going forward.
Minorities are often expected to dim their light. They’re told “stay in your lane” and “don’t rock the boat.” But in order to lead, they must forgo meekness and dare to be bold. When taking risks, failure is inevitable – but it can also be transformative.
Practice making the most of your mistakes by writing down three occasions you’ve taken risks. Ask yourself, what were the consequences, and would you do it again? Next, think of instances where you were tempted to pretend you knew the answer to something. How did you handle it? What happens when you say you know the answer, and what happens when you say you don’t?
Embrace a “Work-Life Jenga” by organizing your time honestly and strategically.
Abrams rejects the pursuit of a work-life balance. According to her, this presupposes that every area of our lives should be granted equal time and attention, which is unrealistic and results in self-loathing when it’s not achieved.
Everyone has to manage surprise obligations sometimes. Life interferes with even the most carefully plotted plans. What Abrams suggests is to accept this reality – and then approach managing your time like a game of Jenga, in which you stack equal-size blocks to form a perfect tower and then pull them out, one by one, re-stacking them on top. Make the best possible strategic moves to keep the metaphorical tower from crashing down – and if it does, build it again.
The key message here is: Embrace a “Work-Life Jenga” by organizing your time honestly and strategically.
The binary of a work-life balance is at odds with prioritizing what matters most to you. When our priorities change, it usually means adding and subtracting the amount of attention we give to different things. For Abrams, becoming a legislator meant shelving one of her hobbies: writing and publishing romance novels. She misses penning the stories swirling around in her brain and believes she’ll return to it one day. But right now, her priorities have shifted.
So how can you identify your priorities? They should animate your mind and your heart, and they shouldn’t be based on judgment or fear. This is how you can figure out what really matters to you instead of what you’re told to want.
It’s also helpful to categorize things based on importance and urgency, as President Dwight D. Eisenhower did. Abrams adapted his method using these four categories: Gotta Do, Need to Do, Oughta Do, and Might Get Around To.
Things you’ve gotta do are things that are crucial and must happen right now. Meanwhile, you should work hard to accomplish the things you need to do early, in order to build up goodwill when the unexpected happens. Take Lindsey, a woman who worked for Abrams for years. She had to take time off to attend to a crisis, and Abrams gave her unlimited leave because she’d always taken initiative and demonstrated reliability.
When another person’s needs require your urgency, that falls under oughta do. And finally, things you might get around to aren’t very important or urgent.
Managing your time is easier when you focus on what you’re good at and give up control. Ask yourself if you absolutely must be the person to get the job done. If not, and if someone else can do it as well as you or better, step back.
To help figure out what matters most to you, write a newspaper headline about the future you, three to five years from now. Then write a newspaper headline about you seven to ten years in the future.
To acquire power and make real change, you must be creative with your resources and challenge yourself.
Creating change is possible even when you lack resources. In fact, the limitations imposed on outsiders and minorities can often help spark creative breakthroughs.
During Abrams’s third year in the Georgia legislature, the Republican majority planned to push a stack of dangerous legislation through on Crossover Day – the day in which bills must pass either the House or the Senate to stay alive during the rest of the legislative season. The Democrats seemed to be out of options. But Abrams had an idea that would obstruct the process, at least a little bit. After checking the rules of the House, she found that every member was allowed to spend 20 minutes questioning each bill. No one usually used all of their time – but if all 75 Democrats spent 20 minutes on all of them, the process would be slowed considerably.
Ultimately, some of the more controversial bills had to be dropped because of the delays. Though they were outnumbered, the Democrats were able to make a difference by virtue of Abrams’s creativity.
The key message here is: To acquire power and make real change, you must be creative with your resources and challenge yourself.
You can’t go into battle without weapons – but with a little ingenuity, you can devise ways to use what you have. Inventory your assets: perhaps you have information, access, a familiarity with the situation, or the power to withdraw your participation.
Remember not to let your position determine your sphere of influence. Ashley Robinson served as a field operative for a campaign Abrams managed. Her responsibilities were knocking on doors and inputting the data she’d compiled. But Robinson went beyond her assigned duties when she noticed and recorded a set of insightful patterns about the voters. Her initiative prompted Abrams to redeploy her teams. Abrams was so impressed with Robinson that she hired her for various subsequent projects, and eventually as her chief of staff when she became the minority leader.
Another way to drive change is to clarify what constitutes a win for you – and adapt your mission to the circumstances. Accept that gaining power is often done incrementally, as those in power aren’t going to give it up easily. Think about what’s possible in the short term and how small victories can add up to a larger one. You can use a social justice strategy called power mapping, in which you identify who’s in charge and how your interactions with them might help you reach your goals.
For your final exercise, channel Abrams’s spreadsheet and map your ambition. In five columns, write down what you want, why you want it, what strategies you can use to attain it, what help you need, and who can help you, and finally, when you hope to accomplish it.
Final summary
The key message in these blinks:
To go from outsider to leader, you must master ambition, fear, opportunity, access, money, and failure. Be bold in your vision. Remember that fear can be defeated if you’re willing to own it and use it. Hack traditional systems and take advantage of every opportunity. Be creative with limited resources. Accept that winning takes time, so prepare for the long haul.
Actionable advice:
Write headlines about yourself.
Imagine you’re a newspaper reporter, and your job is to write ten- to 15-word headlines about your life. Write headlines from three to five years in the future and include what you’ve accomplished personally, professionally, and in the community. Next, write newspaper headlines about your future self in seven to ten years. Finally, imagine you’ve solved a crisis – in your community, in your family, or in the world. Describe what it was and how you did it. These exercises will help you identify your priorities for your Work-Life Jenga.
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What to read next: Vanguard, by Martha S. Jones
By now, you’ve learned that creating change is possible if you’re bold in your vision. You’ve also learned about Stacey Abrams’s historic civic activism as an organizer registering people of color in Georgia to vote. If you want to learn more about the history of the struggle for justice in the United States, check out our blinks to Vanguard.
Vanguard is told from the perspective of the African American women who organized to abolish slavery and end the disenfranchisement of all women. These blinks show how Black women were at the forefront of the struggle for equality, defying racism and sexism in their quest to create a democracy that lived up to the ideals of the American Revolution.